As always, the words in italics is the "other" voice in Dave's head.
“Am I under arrest?” Dave’s father asked.
“No, Hal,” Nazzaro answered, “but that doesn’t mean you won’t be if you can’t explain yourself better than this—right now, I hate to say, I have to agree with Pepper. It sounds like you’re confessing to murder or accessory to murder; I can’t ignore it.”
Dave put his hands to his head and rubbed back and forth to try and make his migraine go away, to make it all go away―to have the voice stop. “I can’t believe this―I won't,” he said, louder than he intended.
You’re as chicken shit as ever, Davy―always hidin' from the truth.
"Just shut up!" Dave yelled.
“No, Hal,” Nazzaro answered, “but that doesn’t mean you won’t be if you can’t explain yourself better than this—right now, I hate to say, I have to agree with Pepper. It sounds like you’re confessing to murder or accessory to murder; I can’t ignore it.”
Dave put his hands to his head and rubbed back and forth to try and make his migraine go away, to make it all go away―to have the voice stop. “I can’t believe this―I won't,” he said, louder than he intended.
You’re as chicken shit as ever, Davy―always hidin' from the truth.
"Just shut up!" Dave yelled.
"Now David," his father said, putting a hand on his shoulder, "don't be disrespectful to the sheriff― you were raised ... I raised you better than that."
***
The link
to the other Weekend Writing Warriors is here. You're
bound to find something to pique your interest.
The Sunday Snippet writer's on Facebook are here. Between the two there is something for everyone. Thank you for any comments you leave me. Much appreciated!
The Sunday Snippet writer's on Facebook are here. Between the two there is something for everyone. Thank you for any comments you leave me. Much appreciated!
***
BLURB:
When
three small coffins are unearthed near the Wiscoy Creek during a
routine dredging operation, it’s the last thing DAVE ROBERTSON, of the Lamont Weekly Times, expected. Pinned to the skeleton’s clothing are pictures from milk cartons of missing girls.
Dave is stunned to find that one of the girls is Sally―a foster child his parents had cared for through the Friends of Foster Families (FFF) program. Cold case files reveal the girls disappeared over 20 years ago. Knowing his house was the last place he saw Sally alive, he can’t help but suspect his dad.
How can he write the biggest story of his career if his father turns out to be the killer? If the voice in his head would shut up and let him remember, he might figure it out before he loses his mind and his dad is charged with murder.
Full blurb and snippet recap here.
Dave is stunned to find that one of the girls is Sally―a foster child his parents had cared for through the Friends of Foster Families (FFF) program. Cold case files reveal the girls disappeared over 20 years ago. Knowing his house was the last place he saw Sally alive, he can’t help but suspect his dad.
How can he write the biggest story of his career if his father turns out to be the killer? If the voice in his head would shut up and let him remember, he might figure it out before he loses his mind and his dad is charged with murder.
Full blurb and snippet recap here.
Hal seems like such a nice guy. This is too obvious, and I can hardly wait to read this book and see who REALLY was the murderer. :-) Great 8, Cindy! :-)
ReplyDeleteIt seems that there is more in this family than a murder case, why is Hal hesitating?
ReplyDeleteHe's def seems to be suppressing what happened.I'm with him, if this happened or I thought it had happened in my family, idk what I'd do either. Very skillful writing.
ReplyDeleteMaybe he should listen more to the "other voices."
ReplyDeleteNice 8!
I'm wondering what Dave really knows... or what he think he knows. Great 8 as usual.
ReplyDeleteGreat 8! I like how he speaks his mind and stands up to the sheriff.
ReplyDeleteIt's a mystery to this reader. Hey, that's what it's all about. Super eight.
ReplyDeleteCindy, this really is great! There's so much going on here, some of it pretty clear, some implied. I so want to know what's in Hal's past!
ReplyDeleteI'm starting to suspect Dave, now . . . what is he repressing?
ReplyDeleteSUCH an intriguing story and all the twists and turns keep me thoroughly engaged and wanting more. Excellent excerpt!
ReplyDeleteLike Sarah W, I'm starting to suspect Dave (or at least the voice in his head). Geat snippet!
ReplyDeleteYelling at the voice in your head in front of cops is probably not the way to go. o.O
ReplyDeleteI'm really curious about the odd hesitation in talking about how David was raised.
Great snippet! The tension just keeps building!
ReplyDeleteLove the thick tension and that no one really knows what's going on. Fabulous.
ReplyDeletePoor Dave, he's having more and more outbursts answering himself or his other self or.....
ReplyDeleteIt is curious what his dad meant isn't it? Glad to see so many different theories. That's a good thing when one is writing a mystery.
Thanks for all your comments.
What is in Dave's past? I don't think he knows himself.
ReplyDeleteOoh. Voices in his head. Like it! Also like the title -- Milk Carton Murders. It sounds so real -- like a nickname given to a high profile case by the authorities.
ReplyDeleteNicely done building on what came before, Cindy. Great snippet. :)
ReplyDeletePoor Dave, nobody needs voices in their head...unless they're an author : ) You have us all guessing you naughty author!
ReplyDeleteGreat characterization! The migraine 'rubbing' was a nice touch.
ReplyDeleteWow! The tension in this scene is palpable. Good job!
ReplyDeleteAnother fantastic excerpt! Loved the dialogue. Very powerful scene! :)
ReplyDeleteHe is gonna be in some serious trouble if he doesn't explain... Eep! Can't wait to see where it goes. Great job! :D
ReplyDeleteSomething is a little "off" with Hal. He is hiding something or knows more.
ReplyDelete